this has been one of the roughest weeks of my life. honestly. i've gone through such an emotional rollercoaster. (this is b/c of student body elections, btw)

sad. happy. mad. excited. scared. upset. pleased. betrayed. offended. nervous. confident. stressed. pumped. tired.

i dont really even know what to think anymore, i never imagined the craziness of all this

SO MUCH is piling up on me, i don't know what to do. today in physics lab some of us talked about our future for maybe half an hour. i have no clue what i'm gonna be doing, or how i'm going to prepare for it. there's so much to think about with that, along with just the near future with stupid little things like tests and homework, and extracurriculars. i don't know how to prioritize because i feel like everything is important in some way or another. i'll end up spending time thinking about something and putting off something else, which is actually just as important to get accomplished. maybe i should go to a career counselor or something...i don't know.

we had a roller skating social (SAA and Charleston 40) tonight, i hadn't done that since probably 5th grade. and of course i was shabby at it, and fell on my ass a couple times, one time being a pretty bad wipeout. i'm actually sore now, but i also worked out so that might add to it.

fresh sheets on the bed...sleeping will be great tonight. but i'm not sleepy, i feel really energized probably from the workout. i wanna even go running outside now except for the fact that i'd probably get mugged at some point, and it's a little chilly.

it felt good to have some time to myself tonight...sometimes i forget what it's like to not be around people 24/7.

but then i found myself with nothing on the agenda (homework not included), and as usual, couldn't figure out what to do. it's hard to not be busy. i tried to do some kaplan and ended up dozing off so i just took a quick nap.

we have a new pledge class now...it's crazy thinking that just 1 year ago i was in their position. it feels like an eternity since it's all happened...i can't even imagine life the way it used to be anymore.

4.

this semester, i can't have a heavy social life. i need to make myself not do anything but study during the week, and force myself to study during the day on weekends.

i have to take the DAT, and the MCAT, one month apart. and before that, i have to study the kaplan to learn the material that i've already gone over in college.

i need to make almost all a's...and with work, volunteering, SGA, SAA, APO, PIKE, i don't know how this is all going to pan out.

honestly...i'm scared. overwhelmed. stressed. and this is just the beginning of the semester.

maybe i had too long of a break to do nothing for a month, that i'm too adjusted to the non-busy life.

something's gotta change. maybe just my time management. maybe not.

as i did last year and the year before, i'll post some goals (not resolutions)...and also see what i accomplished last year.

last year...

- get a volunteer job at the hospital
- lose the belly and keep it off
- work out at least 3x a week
- make all A's spring semester
- make homecoming a huge success
- have 15 or more people be activated for aPHIo, and have a good pledge process
- do well in organic chemistry
- learn how to surf
- find a good place to live next year w/good people
- save more money

got the volunteer job, i'm starting next week in recovery. homecoming was a huge success, with robert randolph and all. we had enough people activated for aPHIo in the spring. i ended up getting a b and c+ in organic 1 and 2, respectively. also got a good living situation. so...5/10 goals accomplished, not bad.

last year i wouldn't have EVER imagined being where i am now, going through all the things i've gone through. i never would've pictured pike, aphio president, or sga secretary all possible at the same time. and so much more than that too. it's been unreal...but in a great way.

for 2006...i hope to:
- lose the belly and keep it off
- work out at least 3x a week
- bring my GPA up to a 3.4
- do well on the DAT/MCAT, get into dental/med school
- make homecoming a huge success AGAIN
- learn how to surf
- find the ultimate house for next year, with cool people
- save money more
- learn how to sail
- become student body president
- develop better speaking skills
- have the best summer imaginable (being 21 and in charleston)
- grow stronger bonds with the fraternity brothers
- keep in touch with friends who study abroad